philopopsicle once exclusive, now accessible to anyone. don't convince yourself that just because you have read some of my bloggerings, it doesn't necessarily follow that you already know me as a person. most of the words written here are just a burst of an immense emotion that needs to find a decent way of break through. i may not write well as you think you do but what the hell, it is my blog. and for those who appreciate, gratitude is my sincere shot.
missed writing. this past few days i've been very much stressed out. that related learning experience thing have been into my veins and system already. i don't ever what to go back to any community again. it's just too tiring and hassle. this is my only time to rest because after this day i have loads of things to do again. and this past few days, i've been sleeping so late, i even forget to eat and AND poop! haha. here's a trivia:
a person will die from total lack of sleep sooner than from starvation. death will occur about 10 days without sleep, while starvation takes a few weeks.
haha! good thing i got to sleep already. but combination of not eating and sleeping is more hazardous! so it's really important to sleep and eat.
rest rest baby.
what are things that has to get done?
- have edit my speech which i think is due today. yes today.
- have to finish that freaking homework in health care. how do you guys get the formula for the density?
- have to find a trivia about heart. anybody help?
- have to do my project in statistics. which i really really don't know how to start with.
- have to edit pictures for computer and think of an idea to make the whole thing.
- have to study for the make up test in microbiology.
- and have to revise that rle thing.
change topic.
this past few days i've been feeling down too. urgh. obedience. i know is a virtue, but at the same time. it's sucker! it sucks the hell out of your life. follow. i hate that word. it contradicts the essence of initiative and individuality. that is why i hate authoritarians. and that is why there is the word democracy to oppose it. and i want it. i want what i want. but i guess, it's not democracy at all.. because it has nothing to do with the good of others. so what if i follow what my heart wants? it doesn't necessarily follow that i could move others too.
i hate it when my parents make sense. i can not say "no" to them. and i also do believe that parents knows what is best for their children, but i still do believe that i got the last say. but then, why oppose the person who had always been there for you? and who always supported and only wants the best for you. so i end up following them. in time i know i could make my own decisions, and by that time, i know i was led to somewhere i really wanted to be. but the feeling at this point of time is sucky. big time sucker! and only gets harder as the time shortens and all you can do is say goodbye to every memory you've created. and only weakens you to hear someone tell you that he's/ she's not sure until when he/she could wait. when all you did was to wait too but failed some parts in the process of waiting. sucky.
You are everything i wanted,
and more...