philopopsicle once exclusive, now accessible to anyone. don't convince yourself that just because you have read some of my bloggerings, it doesn't necessarily follow that you already know me as a person. most of the words written here are just a burst of an immense emotion that needs to find a decent way of break through. i may not write well as you think you do but what the hell, it is my blog. and for those who appreciate, gratitude is my sincere shot.
Monday, September 10, 2007
still too overwhelmed 8:28 PM
this past few days i've been feeling so drained out. i'm having zits as size as jupiter, eyeBAGS as big as luggages, oh crap. this community thing is killer.
tiring, annoying, but at the same time fun.
tiring because we have to walk under the scourging heat of the sun, carry heavy bags because we have no where to leave it for we couldn't trust anybody there. we have to stand during the interviews. and we always have to do something to be fair with others and we can not take a rest because once the clinical instructor saw us sitting and bumming around she will scold us to death.
annoying because we have to bare the very unpleasant smell, combination of the smell of dirty stagnant canals on which the children are pooping, imagine. just imagine the smell sticking to us, oh that is so tormenting. sweat dripping all over our body because of so much heat. stickyness of the sunblock to protect our skin from the heat of the sun, disturbed to get sun burn, on which by the way is so painful. having to deal with non cooperative people. we always have to be aware to all the scattered "shitting stars" or BULALAKAW as populary called, on which is found everywhere you look. having to deal with fierce looking dogs and annoying smelly cats. urgh. we also have to hide from our clinical instructor because one way or another she would just scold at us or instruct us on more things to do.
and fun because we get to know people. we're learning practically without the boring books. we really willing to serve and help the poor. situations make us think and be wise. haha. meet nice people who let us sleep because we we're exaggerately tired. challenged because our clinical instructor expect something from us. fun because as a group we really do things together, like eat, commute, wait for each other, help each other bring stuffs, remind each other, write, interrogate, and work together. yeah. camaraderie baby. hehe. and just laugh or smile when something goes wrong.
haiz, friends which are so overwhelmed.
not gonna mention names anymore.
urgh. think people. THINK! you also have to use your brains and not just emotions. don't be so caught up with the "magical" feeling. it's nice to have that fey feeling somethimes but never let that feeling fool you. be logical for heaven's sake. exchanging friends for someone special. getting into problems which has nothing to do with you. hello! ok ka lng!? wake up.
You are everything i wanted,
and more...